


Birthday Cakes of Contraception

by the_toadlet



Series: Treats & Pastries -Phan [5]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M, crakier?, even crackyier, oh well, something
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-28
Updated: 2017-03-28
Packaged: 2018-10-12 06:13:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10483962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_toadlet/pseuds/the_toadlet





	

“ Happy Birthday, Dan!” Dan forced his face into some semblance of a smile. This was fine, but Phil invited a  _ lot  _ of people. There giant house was nearly packed. Dan wasn’t sure he even knew half these people, but oh well, there was no backing out now.

  


Phil wormed his way through the crowd, holding a badly decorated cake above his head.

  


“ Cake, coming through, pardon me. Oh, I’m so sorry!” One of the guests squawked indignantly at Phil and his sheepish grin. “ It’s for our birthday boy, you know. ‘Scuse me!” Dan froze. Was Phil really going to… Fuck. Dan stood up from the couch, slouching to stay hidden in the crowd.

  


“ Daaaaan, where are yooou…” Phil sing-songed through the crowd after not finding him on his couch, where he had been all night. A pair of bright brown eyes glared at Phil through the crowd, and Phil smirked at his darling hubby.

  


“ Noooo-!” Dan shrieked when Phil handed the cake off to PJ and ran full-fledged through the crowd of people. 

  


“ Gotcha!” Dan pouted, but reluctantly let himself be pulled to a grinning PJ. 

  


“  _ Happy birthday to yoooou…”  _ Dan cringed through the entire song, but eventually Phil handed him an overly large knife and dan attacked the cake with a vengeance. And nearly shit himself when he heard something pop.

  


“ Phil, what the fuck is this?  _ Are you fucking pregnant?”  _ Dan held up the mangled pregnancy test that he found in the cake.

  


“ I’m not pregnant, buuuut…”

  


“ Aw, shit, did you buy a child off the black market?”

  


“ Not this time..”

  


“  _ Tell me. What. You. Did. _ ”

  


“ I got us a dog!”

  


“ You did? What?”

  


“ He’s still a puppy, but this is Cooper.” Phil whipped a picture of a tiny puppy out of a pocket somewhere and presented it to Dan with a flourish. The crowd was silent as Dan considered the tiny basset-shiba inu pup.

  
“ He’s adorable.” The crowed aww-ed as Dan pushed the cake off his lap and pulled Phil into a deep kiss.


End file.
